Nicole’s 7 Things I Wish I Knew Sooner in Motherhood (Episode #20)
In the previous episode, we talked about seven things Kendra wishes she knew sooner in motherhood. Today, it’s Nicole’s turn to share the secrets in her motherhood toolkit. (A teaser: childbirth can actually feel SATISFYING!)
In those first few years, when we’re holding our newborns and are extremely fatigued, it can be hard to see the big picture. But what we want you to know is that this experience is helping you in ways you can’t see yet.
We hope that you embrace parenthood as the hero’s journey that it is, from the refusal (THIS isn’t what I thought it would be!) to all the people you meet along the way, including mentors, teachers, and other parents.
Eventually, after crossing into the dark forest, you’ll return home and share what you’ve learned with other mothers who are finding their way. This is what we are doing today, and this is what the community of motherhood is all about.
In this episode you’ll hear about:
How sensations in childbirth can actually feel SATISFYING – and how high adrenaline levels and tension will only create more pain and suffering
The anxiety, depression, and overwhelm Nicole could have avoided if someone had told her this one thing about breastfeeding
The impact the right foods and physical body care have on postpartum recovery – and in particular, the impact of prioritizing core and pelvic strength
The value of removing ourselves from the house, which can help us reset and avoid setting up patterns of dependency
How parenthood is the greatest personal development journey – and how part of that is sharing what you’ve learned with other parents finding their paths
How finding a third “helper” can help us feel more equipped and ward off postpartum depression
Notable Quotes from Nicole
“Something that I wish I had known about birth is that the sensations of birth – like the labor sensations – can be incredibly satisfying. I didn't need to fear them so much. I literally had a stack of books on my first pregnancy called, like, ‘How to feel the fear and do it anyway,’ and, ‘How to avoid pain in childbirth.’ It was all about the pain and fear for me. And that guided so much of my preparation and how I experienced my birth. I wish someone had just told me there's the possibility that your labor sensations will feel orgasmic. Will feel satisfying. Will feel incredible.”
“Even when somebody was ‘hanging out’ with the baby, I was just there. I wouldn't leave. And this really came back to bite me later because I developed this belief in my own head that I couldn't be gone. That I was needed all the time, everywhere. And then it really just set up a pattern of dependency that was just not necessary. Soon it dawned on me that actually, when I leave, and I'm not here, I get a complete reset. I get to see different things, think different things, feel different things. My kids and whoever was hanging out with them — whether a babysitter, a family member, or my husband – they get to do things they can't do, or they wouldn't do in the same way, if I were here.”
“We actually have to go into that dark forest and make our own path. Once we find our way on our path – which takes some time – but we do find it, and we recognize that the journey we're on is ours, and we begin to take it as our own. Then we start to see the road back. We start to pave our way back from that place. Everything that we've learned, through all the trials, tribulations, ordeals, the passage we made through the dark forest, we gathered knowledge, understanding, and discovery of our own selves, our own resources, our own abilities. We are all our own heroes on our own journeys. We return back to the homeland. We tell what we learned, and we share. This is what the community of motherhood is about.”
Resources & Links
Looking for support to stay active during your pregnancy or start your postpartum recovery? Here are some options to get you started on a great path forward:
1) Take the Pelvic Floor & Core Strength Quiz. After taking the quiz, you'll get a score and based on your results, guidance on what steps to take to move you forward in your recovery.
2) Check out our podcast listening guides: Download the Pregnancy Listening Guide or Postpartum Listening Guide.
3) If you're pregnant, want to be way more active than you have been, AND want connection with other mothers, but don't know where to start…join the Expecting to Flourish™ Membership - a mom-driven and expert-guided virtual space empowering moms with a new approach to prenatal fitness and birth prep that actually prepares you for the physical and emotional hurdles of motherhood.
If you’re postpartum and ready to get moving, need to heal your body but you don’t know where to start…join us for Postpartum Repair & Restore LIVE, a science-backed and fun-stacked, Diastasis and Pelvic Floor Strength program. Start healing your diastasis and eliminating leaking in 8 weeks or less with our guidance.
4) Do you prefer working one-on-one, or have a high risk pregnancy, a severe diastasis or leaking that won’t quit? You might be a candidate to work with us privately. To find out, take this quick self assessment! If you qualify, you'll be invited to schedule a complementary Postpartum Strategy Session with us where we'll take a good look at what's not working in your repair process, and come up with a great plan just for you.
